Elizabeth Silver with nine acceptance letters from multiple universities
Also a Sexual Abuse Survivor, Thankful for #MeToo Movement
Elizabeth Silver, a member of the Haliwa-Saponi tribe, has been accepted at nine universities, as of this writing. Although she has not chosen which one she will attend yet, her story is very much worth sharing.
Here is her interview:
What is your full name and parents’ names?
My name is Elizabeth Caroline Silver, and my parents are Jimmie Silver and Terri Hedgepeth Silver.
Name the universities/colleges that you have been accepted to, and which one will you choose?
I’ve been accepted to Wingate University, Barton College, UNC-Pembroke, UNC-Chapel Hill, NC State University, NC Wesleyan College, Drexel University, East Carolina University and NC A&T. I’m not sure which University I will attend, but my top three choices are NC State, UNC-Chapel Hill and East Carolina.
You are a sexual abuse survivor. It takes a great deal of courage to speak on this topic — can you talk a little bit about your experience?
I was first sexually assaulted and harassed when I was 14, and the abuse lasted until I was 16. The abuse always occurred in a public place, where I was supposed to be safe and secure. The sexual abuse was done by a guy I called my friend. Actually, most people who are sexually abused, know their abuser. I also knew that “my friend” wasn’t only sexually abusing me, but other females as well. Since I considered this guy a friend, I didn’t ask for help in fears that he would hate me. I also didn’t know how to exactly go about the situation to get help. Plus, with it going on for over two years, I found peace in his violence. One day I got up the nerve to tell my friend, and she told me I needed to tell an adult. So I did, with her by my side. The next obstacle I encountered was if I was going to press charges or not. I thought about it long and hard, and decided to not press charges, due to me not wanting to destroy his future.
How has the #MeToo movement affected you?
I think the #MeToo movement is great! The movement really shows men and women who were once or currently abused that they aren’t alone. One thing about dealing with sexual abuse is that you feel alone most of the time. It feels really good seeing a group of sexual assault survivors coming together under one hashtag. It’s very inspirational when people tell their stories and how they overcame the same things you are going through.
What advice can you give another sexual abuse survivor?
The advice I would give another sexual abuse survivor is to get help. Sexual abuse really leaves a mark on you that can last forever. I’ve even thought about going to therapy, because sometimes I have flashbacks of him touching me or the sexual things he used to say to me. You’re not alone, and if you need to get help after you tell someone what is going on, then get help. Also, I would tell a sexual abuse survivor that it’s okay if you didn’t press charges. There are people that are going to come up to you and tell you that you should have pressed charges or you should have done this differently. Well guess what? They haven’t been in your shoes (most likely), so do what you are comfortable with doing. Also, to the male sexual abuse survivors, just because you’re a man doesn’t mean you should suffer in silence. To all my survivors, tell your story, because I guarantee it’ll help someone else.
What drives you?
One of the main things that drive me are my family and my tribe. Also, people having expectations can drive me as well. If it wasn’t for people having expectations of me and realizing how far I could go in life, then I probably would have given up a long time ago. I work better under pressure. My family and tribe are very supportive, and they give me the extra push I need at times.
Where do you see yourself in five years/ten years?
In the next two or three years, I plan on running for Miss Indian North Carolina. In five years, I see myself working on my doctoral degree. I want to become an OB/GYN. That’s been my dream job since I’ve been a child. In ten years, hopefully I’ll be working as an OB/GYN, married and starting a family.
You carry yourself with such confidence — where does this confidence come from?
I didn’t become confident until about two years ago. As a child, I was bullied very badly, and sometimes I would come home crying or cry myself to sleep. As I got older, I realized what self-love actually meant. I began to love myself, and with self-love, there comes confidence. Of course, there are times that I don’t feel like I’m pretty or good enough, but everyone has those moments.
Your sister had her baby early, and he is truly considered a miracle baby — how has his life affected yours?
Emory (my nephew) is the highlight of my life. By us not being sure if he was going to survive before he was born, I am very grateful for him, probably more so than if he was full term. I’ve realized how precious everyone’s life is. I also realized how we should take advantage of the small things, like having a healthy baby, because sometimes, things get hectic with Emory needing more attention than a normal baby.
You are a beautiful young woman. Have you considered modeling?
I’ve had people asked me if I’ve thought about modeling before. Truth is, I haven’t, but if the opportunity provided itself, I would take it.
It appears that the future is very bright for this young lady, and we all pray for much success as she ventures forward into the world!
